Fate, You’re A Mother Fucker

My older brother Laine is a big horror fan. He’s been going to horror-themed conventions for as long as I can remember, and has a huge collection of horror movies, autographs, etc. Every year, he goes to a really big convention in another state, and last year, that organizer decided to start doing one here in the Cincy area. You may recall that I attended that convention with him as well.

What I didn’t mention was that a friend of mine went with me, and she got incredidrunk. Here in Ohio, we have some no smoking laws. There is no smoking in restaurants, and a lot of public places. More and more places are restricting smokers to outside smoking areas, and the hotel the convention is at is no exception. Because my friend is a smoker, we had to go out to the smoking area. While we were out there, we met a guy who was staying there at the convention as well. She was flirting with him quite a bit, but after several conversations with him, I realized that it was ME he was interested in.

My friend was intent on spending the night with this guy though, and she was too drunk to drive home. He offered to let her stay in his room overnight, but she would only stay if he wanted to have sex with her. Normally, I would say “what happens at the horror con, stays at the horror con” but the fact that she stayed in his room with him, and then told me the next day how bad he was in bed, is my only proof that he did in fact, have sex with her. I felt kind of bad for him at the time, because he obviously wasn’t really in to her, and was only trying to keep her from drunk driving. She refused to come home with me, and I wasn’t staying at the hotel. I had to go home, and he got stuck with her.

I was leary of him to begin with because he wouldn’t tell us his last name. He wasn’t as intelligent as he thought though, because he told us his real first name, and the city he’s from. He claimed to be single, but I’m not a moron, so I knew that the fact that he wouldn’t tell us his last name meant something shady. Rico Sauve he was not, because who can’t come up with a legit last name for fuck’s sake??

My SIL saw him this past spring at another convention, but he had no idea that through her super stalking sleuthing skills, she had found out not only his last name, but the name of his business, and that he has a wife and 3 kids. No big surprise, I guess. I stopped feeling sorry for him when I saw pictures of him at WDW with his kids.

Then, lo and behold, he showed up here at the convention last weekend. He tried to act like he didn’t recognize me, but he couldn’t pretend he didn’t recognize my SIL because he was talking to her at the last convention, so he came up and started chatting with her. She turned to me and said, “You remember….” and the look of fake surprise on his face was nearly comical. I had seen him looking at me more than once already that day, so I knew he remembered me. I ignored him the rest of the weekend.

I decided to look him up on a certain social network, and attempt to add him. He still thinks we don’t know anything about him, and I thought he deserved the shock of having me try to add him. I couldn’t find him though, because he has a somewhat common name, and it could be that he doesn’t use that network. But do you know who I did find?

His wife.

And now it was my turned to be shocked. She’s a blogger. And some of you know who she is. I don’t read her blog myself, but I know some of you out there right now do. She seems like a nice person, and she’s a mom. But like I said I have no personal contact with her myself. If I ran into YOUR husband at a con, and knew he slept with my BFF, would you want to know about it?

I’m still just kind of reeling from the moment of finding out that this totally random guy turned out to be connected to me in some Kevin Bacon six degrees of separation way. I have no proof though, because I’m not going to drag my friend into it. She’s in a relationship now and didn’t go to the con this year. And as I said, his wife has no idea who I am. Would she just think I’m some crazy stalker who wants her husband? And for all I know, she knows he goes around to these different conventions and takes strange women back to his room, and is ok with it. And as I said, I am a firm believer that what happens at the con, stays at the con. And it’s none of my fucking business. Right? Right.